Day 24, 76 to go: Pear tart

Not pajamas

I’ve  been meaning to make this tart for a while.  Last night, I finally put it together.  Why I waited until Castle was on is beyond me.  (I guess I will have to rewatch it on line.)  The tart was yummy.  I used frozen puff pastry, tossed the pears with cinnamon, ginger and sugar and put them on a bed of cinnamon ginger cream cheese.  It was great for breakfast too.

Today was a total loss on the pajama front though.  I guess I needed a day of rest.  I was really hoping to power through and finish all these pjs.  Instead, I got nothing done. 

And it reminded me of what put me on this mission in the first place: warding off the Depression that loves to come and haunt me in the winter.  I did manage to keep myself going for the better part of 3 weeks, which is something.   And I will get back on track tomorrow. 

But the mental game is particularly hard and I need to remember to prioritize it.  A long time ago, a friend gave me a copy of 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.  I remember reading through it and thinking that there was a step they missed.   Actual Step #1 is “Don’t have Depression.” (Step #2 would be “Don’t have Anxiety either.”)

If I don’t pay attention and really think about making sure I am doing whatever I can to ward it off, Depression can win.  Obviously I can’t afford to be swallowed up by it.  I take my meds, I see my Doc.  But I need to do stuff t00.  I need to accomplish tasks.  I need physical activity.  I need to interact with the outside world.  And I can’t allow myself to slack off for more than a day, or it is too easy to slide into the black hole. 

So today, apparently, I battled Depression and lost most of the battle.  On the other hand, I did manage to get dishes done.  I made a lovely dinner of pasta in alfredo with peas.   I talked to friends.  I even got a shower.  Some days, I really do need a check list to make sure I accomplish “activities of daily living.”  So the day was not a total loss.  Tomorrow is another day and I will get some more things done. 

I suspect I am just hitting a wall on the pajama-making front because I really am in the mood to make cookies.  I wonder if I can get myself to make a couple of pajama bottoms tomorrow and reward myself by baking? I am longing to make pumpkin-chocolate chips. It’s all a mental game like that.   How can I structure my day so that I get back on track?  

Step #1: Make a plan.  Step#2: Do whatever it takes to trust the plan and do it.